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Needing Steel Supplies

It’s tough running a small business. Sometimes all you want to do is get your head above water and have the freedom to take on bigger jobs. I can think of dozens of projects I’ve wanted us to take on but have had to refuse as we simply could not make it work logistically. Up until recently, we’ve had to say no to big commercial building projects as we’ve been a business that specialises in building houses and small commercial buildings. We’ve built a reputation for our quality of work and timely completion of projects, but that’s probably because we never bite off more than we can chew.

We recently found ourselves in a tricky situation. We were offered money to take on a huge shopping centre project. One of the biggest shopping centres in the southern hemisphere had bought some neighbouring land and was looking to extend its location. The only issue was we definitely did not have enough steel beams. Melbourne was going through a bit of a steel beam shortage, and there was no chance that our tiny little business was going to be granted the amount of steel we needed for this job.

What on earth does a company do in a situation like this? We didn’t want to say no as we knew it would be good money, but we also didn’t know what actions to take. Steel was a crucial part of this job, and it was not something that could be substituted. I decided all I could do was start putting out the feelers to top-rated structural steel fabricators and suppliers near Melbourne who would be able to help us. Unfortunately, many said they did not have enough steel for this size of job. Everything seemed a little hopeless until one steel company decided to get in touch and tell me they were eager to be part of the project. After a phone call and a visit to the location, I could tell these people were the real deal and could help me out. The project is currently underway as I type.

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Eye Care First

When you become a parent, your whole life changes. You start gaining a new perspective on what does and doesn’t matter in life. Things that used to bother you are now no longer an issue. Meanwhile, things that you never used to even think about have become top of mind. Having a child has definitely changed me. I have a new set of responsibilities that I need to prioritise in my life. I’d say the most important responsibility has definitely been the wellbeing of my child. I want my child to be healthy and happy. Part of my child being healthy and happy is ensuring they have good vision. Once my child turned five years old, I noticed they were struggling with things other children weren’t. My child was struggling to read signs and see things at a distance. 

As a parent, I knew that it would be wrong to ignore my child’s pleas. Especially when there were so many signs that something was wrong. My child was always squinting, holding objects very close to their face, rubbing their eyes, and really hated reading time. I knew I had to do the correct thing as a parent and book an eye test. Bentleigh has an optician not too far from me, so there was no excuse for me to put off the appointment. I remember once watching a video online about a child who had problems with their eyes that could’ve been rectified with early intervention. That video always sits in my mind as a reminder to not put off anything related to health, especially my child’s health. I’d hate to be one of those neglectful parents who has ignored warning signs and now their child is forced to live with symptoms for the rest of their life. 

Last Tuesday I took my child to the best optometrist near me. Cheltenham has multiple optometrists, but I wanted my child to be seen by the best. The better the optometrist we visit from the get-go, the better result I can expect for my child.

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Shoulder Surgery Train

Today has been tricky, folks, I see no point in lying about it. We all have our ups and downs, of course, especially when you get to our age, but things have been a lot harder since I hurt my shoulder so badly.

Luckily, I’ve got a great shoulder surgeon in Melbourne who really knows how to help me feel better, physically and mentally. It’s been an amazing boon, having her in my corner. She must have explained the shoulder arthroscopy procedure to me a million times now, always as patient and gentle as possible. I’ve never had the best of luck (and I’m not particularly religious), but it seems I’ve truly been sent a saint.

She also helped me to understand what exactly I’ve done to the stupid thing. Something about a torn rotator cuff? She said they’ll know exactly what they’re dealing with after the shoulder arthroscopy, of course. 

My daughters have been sweet too, during this difficult time, always bringing me soup or coming over unexpectedly with a grandchild in tow. They’re so consistent about it – there must be a spreadsheet involved somewhere down the line. My eldest, Trudy, is going to bring me to the city for my rotator cuff repair surgery. Melbourne is so far away, I keep telling her. I’ll be fine on the train by myself!

They don’t seem to believe me.

I guess that’s okay – although I don’t know how four hours in a car with Trudy is going to go. We haven’t done a road trip like that since she was a little girl, and never alone! But the thought of climbing the steps onto a train with my arm, or having to lug my bags to the hotel and the hospital… no, I am glad that she’s coming.

We’ll have to see if we can rope another sister in, though, or one of Trudy’s daughters. Maybe if I get a hold of that spreadsheet, I’d know who’s available…

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Alien Bathtub Anatomy

This is the story of an alien named Zor. Zor was a friendly little alien who had migrated to Earth after the great Milky Way Galactic War had begun. Since coming to Earth, Zor had enjoyed life on the blue marble of the Sol System, but he soon realised that there was a problem with human bathtubs.

See, Zor had an unusual anatomy that made human bathtubs quite uncomfortable for him. His limbs were arranged differently and his skin was much more sensitive to hot water. He found it difficult to fit in the tub and would often slip and slide around, unable to relax. Eventually, Zor decided that he would need to get a bathtub modification or two.

Zor sent out a telepathic message, hoping to get an answer to the question ‘where can I find someone to modify my bathtub close to Sydney?’ Eventually, Zor learned of a company that specialised in bathtub modifications. Zor got in contact with them, and they sent out a bathtub expert immediately.

When the expert arrived, Zor told them all about his issues and concerns. The expert immediately got to work on a plan to modify the bathtub so that it would suit Zor’s anatomy. They used special materials that were gentle on Zor’s sensitive skin and created a unique shape to suit his body. Apparently, they had worked on dozens of custom bathtub solutions for elderly aliens since the breakout of the Galactic War, so it was no problem.

Zor was incredibly grateful for the work of the bathtub expert. He knew that they had gone above and beyond to make him feel comfortable and welcomed on Earth. Based on this experience, he knew that Earth was a place where discrimination could not exist in any form, which was a nice change, given the cause of the Galactic War going on in the stars above.

You wouldn’t believe it, but those barbarians from other worlds actually thought it was okay to force other sentient creatures into servitude. Zor was very grateful to now be on a planet that would never see another being as lesser, and where discrimination did not exist.

 

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Open Boating Dramas

When Sailors of the Coast purchased Buoys and Boats from BSR in 1997, the boating world rejoiced, as Sailors immediately announced plans to implement a legal document that would allow boating enthusiasts everywhere to use the B&B handbook to create their own boating instructional content. This would become known as the Open Boating License, or OBL, which was finalised and officially released to the world in 2000. The OBL allowed creators worldwide to borrow from the B&B handbook, including the updated 3rd Edition, also released in 2000. It was said that this legal document was irrevocable and would empower the boating community to create their own content by using the framework B&B had established. Whether you wanted to create a guide to finding the best local marine welding business or instructions for installing your custom bow rail, you could release it commercially under the OBL.

For the 22 years following the release of the OBL, all was well within the B&B community. That was until leaks emerged late last year that Sailors of the Coast intended to revise the OBL for the B&B 6th Edition (officially known as One B&B), adding in royalty structures, the right for Sailors to reproduce, distribute and profit off any content created under the OBL and, most dire of all, the right to further alter the OBL with only 30 days’ notice.

This sent the B&B and wider boating communities into complete shock, followed by outrage. For over two decades, community content had been the backbone of B&B’s success. From every boat merchant to every business offering snapper racks near Melbourne, the boating community was united. Now with the intent to send out abusive contracts to those same creators who had contributed to so much of the B&B handbook’s success, it seemed that Sailors of the Coast had truly fallen to corporate greed, likely due to pressures from executives of their parent company, Has Been.

While the future of B&B remains uncertain, one thing is for sure: the boating community will not let the new OBL through without a fight.

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Keeping Residence Icy

The cooling is pretty important where I work. If you think about it for like, three seconds, you’ll figure out exactly what I mean. Elderly people need a certain level of comfort, because their temperatures just don’t really work the way they used to. So yeah, we just need some really good cooling to keep them comfortable and…the opposite thing. Gets a bit hot for me sometimes, but whatever. It’s just part of the job.

Yesterday, some guy from a company that offers Hawthorn based air con servicing came down to talk to us about our system. I explained the super-extreme importance of keeping all of our residents happy. I guess this is a regular summer thing, from what I’ve heard. We get the same spiel from the same people about what we’ve already been doing. But people DO come here to be comfortable, so it makes sense.

Now we have an extra duty of going through every room in the building and making sure they’re properly chilly. We’ll have to do the same thing in winter, too. If I’m even here then. Seems like a long way off, is what I’m saying.

Otherwise, it’s pretty cool having that rule (rhyme and pun not intended), because it means we’ll always be cool. Seriously, some of these mornings have been flippin’ freezing, and getting to work to find the whole place perfect? It’s the best. I guess it’s because people live here, and we have to keep everything toasty all the time.

I have to say a special thanks to the very best air con servicing Hampton has ever seen.

We have nothing to worry about. If no one else pays attention to all the heat stuff, I know I will.

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Useful Solar Information

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I hoped that Roland would forgive me – I hoped that they all would forgive me. I could never tell them the truth, about why I was about to abandon him to the others in the dark of the abandoned workshop. About the secret capsule I was holding close to my chest, and the secret it might hold to saving us all.

‘Give us what we want,’ the Others’ voice echoed around the dark room, lit only by small patches of moonlight leaking through the rust-drilled ceiling.

‘I don’t have it!’ I called back, stalling for time. ‘I don’t even know what it is! Hell, all I’ve got back here is some sort of guide to who qualifies for the energy saving scheme – what do you reckon that meant? Back then, I mean?’

‘You stall,’ the voice hissed, and I felt a pair of shapes slip away from the shadows – hunters, no doubt, to flush me out and lay me at the feet of their leader.

‘I don’t think that’s fair!’ I cried out, feigning indignation. My eyes lit up as I spotted the remains of a rusted ladder propped up against what had once been a window.

My exit.

‘Look,’ I shouted back quickly, before they could reply. ‘I just think we should go over these numbers, you’d be surprised what solar can do for a small business–’

‘Enough!’ the Other growled, more animal than man. He made an obscene clicking sound, and I felt the shadows shift again, closer to me. I had to move – and quickly.

I bolted, feet pounding ancient metal as I made for the ladder.

A huge thing emerged out of the darkness in front of me, and I reacted without thinking, hurling a fistful of paper in its face and following it up with a right hook. He went down with a thud.

‘Solar panel calculator tool,’ I murmured, as the pages settled. ‘I knew that one would be my favourite.’

‘Stop him!’ the leader croaked.

‘Mac, wait!’

I turned to see Roland, shaking in the dark, a huge hand wrapped around his neck – and I froze.

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Pool Table Conundrum

Jack scratched his head and sat back from the computer monitor with a sigh.

‘What’s got you so contemplative?’ his wife asked with a smirk, flicking the light on in the study as she walked in. She handed Jack a mug of coffee, as he blinked to get his eyes to adjust to the harsh bulb.

‘I’m trying to decide between these two,’ he said, pointing at an online ad for a pool table for sale and a different tab with a treadmill. ‘I should probably buy the treadmill, shouldn’t I?’

‘Well…’ his wife said, glancing around the room for a chance to change the subject. ‘Oh, is that, uh… wall new?’

‘Fine,’ he sighed, moving the mouse over to the fitness side of the screen. ‘But I still think we should get a pool table.’

‘Why?’ she asked, clasping her own warm mug. ‘I’m not sure I’ve ever seen you play pool.’

‘Really?’ Jack said, turning around, surprised. ‘Oh, yeah, I used to love playing pool. My dad had a table when we were growing up. He used to make us play for hours every Sunday – his version of church, he used to say.’

Jack laughed at the memory. His wife sighed.

‘Oh, get the pool table then,’ she relented. ‘If it’ll make you happy, why not?’

‘Really?’ he asked again.

‘You gonna keep saying that?’

‘I thought you’d want me to get fit, and healthy and… all that,’ Jack frowned. ‘But now you just want me to be happy?’

‘You don’t have to sound so suspicious,’ she laughed, standing up and kissing him on the forehead. ‘We’ll find some cheap fitness equipment for sale in Australia soon enough – after New Year’s, when people realise they actually can’t be bothered sticking to their resolutions.’

‘And until then…’

‘Until then,’ she nodded. ‘You can start going back to church.’

He looked up at her with a smile – and very quickly spun around to hit buy on the pool table.

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Space Tinting?

Have you ever been going about your business, trying to make your way in the world like a normal person, when suddenly your life gets flipped on its head? Well, I have. In a huge way, too. It was late on a Friday afternoon, and I was getting ready to wrap up a long day of window tinting. I’d head to the pub with my mates, get a nice cold drink and a parma to celebrate the end of another week.

That was when the spaceship showed up. It was a strange blue vehicle that almost looked like an iron standing upright as it flew through the sky. The ship bore a name that I’m pretty sure I’m not allowed to say here. Anyway, this odd spacecraft landed before me, and out stepped a man in blue and silver armour. It was very fancy and looked extremely expensive. I bet not even a powerful plasma sword could cut through that stuff.

“Mr Alfred,” said the armoured man. “I have searched across the galaxy for the greatest window tinter to ever live. My quest has brought me to you. Supreme Chancellor Palantine wishes for you to be his personal window tinter, giving him the privacy he needs as he leads the Republic to a new era of peace and prosperity. They say that you offer the best window tinting services near Melbourne. Is this true?”

“Supreme Chancellor?” I stammered. “Republic? Galaxy? You mean an alien overlord wants my window tinting services?”

“Just answer the question,” said the man. “Are you the greatest window tinter I’m going to find or not?”

I gulped. “I suppose I am. I have the most five-star reviews out of any window tinter I know.”

“Excellent, you’ll be coming with me, then.”

Using his jetpack, the intergalactic traveller sprung forward, grabbing me by the underarms. He hauled me over to his spaceship without even asking if I wanted to go. So, I guess I’ve technically been kidnapped by aliens, which is a bit of a twist I wasn’t expecting in my life. Anyway, how has your day been?

– Charlie Alfred

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Hardware Store Regular

It’s the 14th day of summer vacation, and it’s going a lot quicker than I’d hoped. Fern and I have been up to all sorts of crazy stuff in the last two weeks. You’re probably wondering how painting Australia went (unless you live in Australia, in which case you’d know perfectly well). It went about as well as you’d expect, which is to say that we achieved our goal for the first day of summer vacation without any complications. Unfortunately, the evil scientist down the street decided to unleash his Raininator 5000 on the entire continent that day, washing all of the paint away before we could show our parents! For some reason, that really upset my big sister Candaice. 

Since then, we’ve been up to all sorts of things. Discovering something that doesn’t exist, building a rocket, climbing the Sydney Opera House and more. There’s a lot you can do in 14 days! Most of them have involved a trip to the best hardware shop in Cheltenham for timber, so we’re kind of regulars now. We’ll actually be heading over there soon since we need lots of quality wood for the petting zoo we decided to make today. The hardware store isn’t open yet, so I figured I’d write up this blog post while hanging out with my pet platypus, Peregrine. Wait, where is Peregrine? I’m sure he’ll turn up somewhere. He always does, usually right after the evil scientist down the street is defeated for the day, interacting with our own shenanigans somehow.

The last time I went to the hardware store to get some building supplies near Cheltenham, one of the employees did give me some attitude, which was a bit odd. He said, “Aren’t you a little young to be building a bridge to Tasmania?” At first, the boldness of the question took me back, but then I decided to just stare him in the eyes and say, “Yes, yes I am.” You wouldn’t believe it, but he just shrugged and sold me the supplies I needed! So yeah, summer vacation is going pretty well.